ebay-logo

It has begun to dawn on me that Ebay is either 'black majic' (that's not racist) or people are liars.

By way of explanation I need only ask you one simple question;

"Have you ever met anyone who didn't come out a winner on Ebay?"

I suspect your answer will be no.

I have never bought or sold anything on Ebay, as I have massive trust issues with the whole concept of it. So all I have to go on are the experiences of friends and work colleagues. But here's the thing;

On the selling front, all I seem to hear are tales of unbelievable sales;
People selling old knackered mobile phones for hundreds of pounds. Old shitty playstation games for more than they cost new. There's a lad at work who sells his teenage son's second hand stinking trainers for the kind of money you'd pay for a kilo of Charlie.

Another lad at work who sold a set of kitchen diner 'faux leather' stools for more than he paid for them, six years ago!! Don't people look at the price of stuff first before they start to bid on Ebay, or are they just carried away by the excitement of it all. Sat at home like David Dickinson on speed.

david d

Equally, I've never met anyone who hasn't got a bargain on Ebay;
"I got this £500 camera for £6 and a happy meal!!"

The number of people who brag about all these majical deals they find on everything from board games to luxury yachts. I don't believe it for a minute.

"I got this Porsche 911 for free! They ran out of garage space and just wanted someone to take it off their hands"

So my point is this;

IF EVERYONE WHO SELLS SOMETHING ON EBAY MAKES A FIVE HUNDRED PERCENT PROFIT AND EVERYONE WHO BUYS SOMETHING, GETS IT FOR THE PRICE OF DUST, THEN WHAT THE FUCK?"

It just doesn't work. It's basic maths I think. Either Ebuyers, like Gordan Brown, have no concept of the cost of living, or there is some kind of voodoo going on. In theory, Ebay should be in a state of massive negative equity and on the brink of implossion (can't spell that).

Ebay just doesn't work. It can't possibly work.

In reality I think the true picture is very different. I think it comes down to pride and ego. Nobody wants to admit they paid £60 for a mobile phone and it never turned up. Nobody wants to admit they've been done. Surely for Ebay to work and balance itself out, there must be 10 horror stories for every positive one. For every pound people save on one item, they must lose ten on another.

That's a more likely explanation.

Essentially Ebay is an online carboot sale. People selling shite that no one wants to idiots who don't really need it. It just seems more glam coz it's done over a laptop instead of out of the back of an old Volvo at the local dogtrack car park.

carboot

I'm planning to start an anti Ebay campaign and would appreciate your suport